Moms Spring Goal

We are a few days away from Spring here in South Africa and I’ve decided to set a new goal that I’d like to get done or at least start during the Spring.

I’m a goal setter, I normally start setting my goals at the beginning of the year. I write then down and then revisit them to see how I’m doing. This year I’ve decided to add an additional one which I didn’t think would make it to my goal list at all this year thinking it may be a bit too soon!

Potty train the baby

My youngest turned 2 in July and I actually was not going to start potty training yet because I thought for myself that it might be too early. She might be ready, I don’t know. One of the reasons for potty training now is that we are looking to put her in a crèche next year and for some of the schools it is a requirement that the kids are potty trained. Winter is also on its way out so it won’t be too cold and she won’t have to freeze her little bum off.

My first born wasn’t fully trained until he was about 4. We sent him to crèche just before he turned 3 and at that facility they started the training and encouraged we keep it up at home as well. While he was still at that crèche he was only using the night time nappy and during the day he didn’t have any accidents. I feel it may be easier to learn at school with the rest of your mates and be a tiny bit embarrassed if you wet your pants but your mates have not.

Mid-year last year we sent the kids to live with the grandparents for a while and my mom started the night time training which he did so well with. There was the occasional bed wetting and yes every once in a while out of the blue he wets the bed but he is extremely good most of the time. All in all I wasn’t too involved with his potty training and I’d like to be involved with my daughters. I also keep thinking its a bit too early to train her since we only started later with the boy but it has to be done.

The strategy for my daughter is to get her into panties during the day and getting her to start sitting on the potty. She has been wearing the Pampers pants for a while now I need her to understand the difference. I’m not going to start her on the potty with the pants. I have already seen on the odd occasion that I’ve tried to get her to sit on the potty that she doesn’t want to take the pants off.

Since I work full time it is going to be the nanny who would need to implement these steps while I’m away at work. She is quite patient with the kids so I hope it’s all going to go smoothly. Sad part is that I won’t be fully involved. I’ll maybe start on the weekend so that I can initiate the process and feel involved. I’m looking forward to the mopping up after her!

If you have any tips or would like to share your experience with me please leave a comment.

Thank you for reading.


Mommy Needs A Time-Out

I have been planning a little getaway with the girls and it is coming up in October and I am super excited. I can’t tell you how much I need to relax and unwind far away from the kids and the husband! Yes, I want to leave the kids and the hubby at home and I’m not phased by this. Mommy needs a 3 night time-out away from the household.

I’ll be traveling to Umhlanga in Kwazulu Natal with two of my cousins and a friend and we are staying for 3 nights. We would leave Johannesburg early in the morning and are traveling by road. I love a good road trip.

I look forward to being on the beach in a really nice swimsuit, something sexy since I’ve last 15kgs over the past year. Can I call myself a yummy mummy? I certainly think so. I have not decided if I want to bikini or one piece since my mom-tum just won’t let me be great but hey I’m still working on it.

Most of the planning is done and accommodation is booked. All that’s left to do is the shopping and packing then off we go. So, what’s the plan for the kids and their dad? I actually don’t know. Fortunately the nanny will be around so dad won’t be too stressed “babysitting” for the entire weekend by himself. I had to rolled my eyes as I typed that out. I say “babysitting” because that’s what he thinks it means to be left alone with the kids, I mean you’re just being a dad, chill out.

It will be my first vacation away from the family. My last vacation in December 2016 was a big family trip. My parents, my kids my twin sister and her three kids, my younger sister and my husband were all there and it was great. Five kids between the ages of 18months and 6 years old at the time all together was chaotic. Feeding them, bathing them, getting them dressed and getting them into the car was a mission to be handled with so much precision that you would forget that we were actually on holiday.

Anyway, I thinks it’s a good idea to get time away as a mom sometimes to rejuvenate and reflect. I have not done a full trip away but my time away from home is normally spent at the gym a few times a week. I often sleep in on a weekend just to have some alone time once dad has left the room. Other times when I’m alone are in the car after doing the school run with my son and my on trip back home from the office. Not so luxurious but a lot of thinking can be done on that 45 minute drive in Joburg peak traffic.

I work a full time job and it is very exhausting. I’m already feeling the fatigue towards year end that makes my mind and body very sluggish and going on this trip before the big December break will help refresh and restore the mind and body for the remaining months of 2017. I know there a a lot of working moms like myself and even full time moms who just need a little break and it’s okay! Don’t put off having time for yourself and the things you want to do as that will only leave you feeling worse than you may already be feeling in the long run. Just do you for a little bit.

Career Anxiety

Here’s the thing, you cannot plan your life and have it turn out exactly how you had dreamt about it and that can be rather disappointing. My life today is not how I had imagined it almost 10years ago when I was completing high school.

I don’t have the house and car I’d imagined and certainly not the job I dreamt I would have by now. I’m still hustling having bought a small place earlier this year and a car I at least like to drive that is in my price range.

In my six year working life I would like to believe I’ve done well and excelled having started as an intern and now managing a small team of four, I think I’m doing ok at this life thing. It may not be the dream job but it’s a start. However six years on I’m finding myself questioning a lot about whether or not this is really what I want to do. Am I in the right industry? How will I continue to grow as a young black female in this very white and very male environment? How will I continue to make myself valuable? These are just some of the questions I ask.

I’m constantly thinking about what my next big achievement in my career is going to be and trying to plan for this and I have to be honest I don’t know how I’m going to move on from where I am and it’s actually scary. Career anxiety! Is there even such a thing? I guess so.

I have a degree and would like to further my studies and pursue a post-grad education but studying in South Africa is rather expensive and it is an expense I simply cannot afford to take on at the moment. I try and focus on ideas that will propel me in establishing my own business however the idea of starting a business without funding is intimidating. I read a lot about how other woman manage and start there own businesses and find inspiration in learning about there success stories. A lot of your women are doing very amazing things in this country and there is no shortage of inspiration.

I guess it’s really about patience while seeking out all those things and simply watching how the story develops at whatever pace without feeling that there is a rush to be at a certain position at a particular time. It’s a long journey ahead. One just needs to keep at it, work hard and flourish.